jueves, 23 de abril de 2020

Hospital where God was

Hello!


At one point in our lives, we have all wondered if God exists. I also had many moments like this. Many days without believing, many days believing a little, many days believing a lot, many days without knowing what to think and in many others I was already tired.


I know that God speaks to each person in a different way. And that's why I want to tell you about an experience I had 8 years ago, when God spoke to me during one night (or several ... you will understand why I say it like this).


What I am going to tell you was very real to me, as if I were awake and conscious. It could be that if it happened or maybe God knew that was a good way to get my attention ...


I invite you to lend me a few minutes of your time to tell you what happened that night:


He was very young, 22 years old, and had several years of being very far from God. I would spend hanging out with my friends, focusing on my studies, work, and personal goals. He wanted to have a good time and he did not spend any time with God. I will not tell you many details of my personal life, but I will tell you that I was not happy at all.



Day 1


It was then that one night when I was sleeping, I suddenly woke up ... but when I opened my eyes I saw that I was not in my bed. I felt awake, very conscious, but disoriented not knowing what was happening. Full of adrenaline from the surprise of waking up in a strange place.


I tried to calm down, put my hand on a wall next to me and took several deep breaths to clear my mind. The last thing I remembered was being in my bed, but now, I was in the internal entrance of a hospital. It was a long, white hallway filled with windows. The following image looks a bit like what I experienced at the time:






I started looking everywhere to try to understand what was happening. I walked slowly through the hallways. There were many people gathered in small groups. They were all calm, they looked at me for a moment while I passed them and then they continued talking as if my presence did not affect them at all. It was then that I realized. That place was nothing like a normal hospital. There were no sick people, doctors, nurses, stretchers, nothing to do with medicine. That made my doubt even bigger.

I could see that this Hospital was large, with long corridors, white walls and many windows through which you could see a forest with very green grass. There were many rooms and after looking inside several I realized that they were all the same. It was a room for a single person, 3 meters long and 2 meters wide, with a single bed and a small piece of furniture in the background, none of them had a window and they were also white inside.


This photo looks a bit like those rooms:






I continued to walk down the hallways and the next thing that caught my eye was that there were benches in the hallways or on the corners where people sat for long hours talking. In some places in front of the benches there were televisions.

The most similar photo I have managed to find is the following (only that there was no one at reception):





A person came up and greeted me. He was a tall, thin man, about 45 years old. I think from my look and my behavior it was obvious that I was new to that place. His name was John, he invited me to sit down and we talked for several hours that first day.


John told me that this was a place where some people went that God wanted to speak to them but that in their daily life ignored God. That he never had time for him. That in many cases God had already spoken to these people through other dreams, circumstances and even through messages that He gave to people they knew. But that, nevertheless, they continued ignoring it.


That first day was not easy for me. I told John that I knew it would be all about having a dream, that I thought I was going to wake up at any moment but that the more the hours passed the more I began to feel nervous about not doing it. To which he replied:


John: You have a room assigned here, nobody but you and God knows where that room is. It may be that today or for a few days God will come to this Hospital and call you to come to your room. Then we will have a talk with him and so you can leave this hospital, wake up, experiment if you think this is a dream or not.


To which I replied: God comes to this place! That can't be true, I don't think so. And also, if it were that simple to get out of here. Why then are there so many people still here?


John took a deep breath and had a few seconds to answer me, like the one who looks at someone and has to explain something so simple that it makes him angry to have to explain it. Then he said to me in a tired voice:


John: You haven't heard anything true?


I was very surprised by his reaction. But since, in my head, a few hours ago I was sleeping in my bed and now I am in a hospital chatting with someone I have never seen in my life, wait for a response that was not so common.


John: Have you been hungry since you've been here? Have you been sleepy, cold, hot, tired, or in need of something? Truly not!


The truth since I had arrived at that place I was so surprised and trying to understand how I got from my bed to that hospital that I had not paid attention to many other details. Despite having already been several hours by that time, I was not hungry or cold or anything.


John: As the days go by, when people feel comfortable here. They don't want to go out. So many when God comes to this hospital and calls them to his room they don't want to go talk. Many of those who are here have many financial problems, great vices with drugs, problems with their families and with their own lives. So this place is a refuge for them and they prefer to stay here before talking to God and worse, going back to their daily life.


All of that left me thinking a lot. John and I continued talking for a while longer, and then he said goodbye. I walk down a long hallway and then turn a corner and didn't see him anymore for that day.


After a while I noticed through the windows that it was getting dark and that some people were returning to their rooms. So I walked down the hallways, with a strange feeling inside me. I knew where I was going, although I would never have been there before. I went up a few tiers and walked down more hallways until I found a room that I knew was mine. I entered and saw that no one was there. I lay down on the bed and I kept thinking a lot about everything that was happening. That first day he had arrived at the Hospital and had understood a little the purpose of being there. Even with more questions than answers excuse me to sleep.



Day 2

I woke up on white sheets after a long sleep. I was suddenly shocked to think that the sheets on my bed weren't white, and that's when everything, like a thud, came back to my mind. I was still in the Hospital, I had not woken up in my house, but continued in that strange but cozy place.


As John had mentioned, having no need of anything in that place. I didn't have to look for a toilet or a place to have breakfast. The idea of ​​not sitting at a table trying a delicious breakfast seemed strange to me.


I was in that room for a while and then I walked around that hospital for a long time. Paying attention to all the details that had been overlooked the day before. No one is fighting, raising their voices or arguing about anything. Everyone was very calm and comfortable. They spent hours sitting talking or watching television. As I remember the youngest person I saw being around 15 years old, and then all kinds of ages. I thought I saw the same number of men as women.


That second day was dedicated to getting to know the people there. He sent me to talk to various men and women, to get to know his life story a little. I remember 2 stories in particular.


One was from a young man of about 25 who was addicted to all kinds of drugs and was in trouble. But he was very pleased for 3 months since he had arrived at that place. It was then that I discovered something new. According to the young man, he lived in Europe and when he was at home it was 2001. This surprised me a lot, since I only speak Spanish and, for me, it was 2012, not 2001!


When talking to a second person. A woman of about 35 years of age, with long and somewhat disheveled hair. It was the same as my surprise since she mentioned that she lived in a different time than mine and in a country with a different language. However, I could understand what he was talking about.


After thinking this for a while. I thought that if I was in a place where I wasn't hungry or cold, I shouldn't be so surprised by talking to someone else who didn't speak my language, or who hadn't lived in the same year as me-



John's Story


After a while I saw John in the distance and went looking for him to talk to him. I told him about my talk with these 2 people and he laughed as if he had been contacted by a very funny joke.


John: what you say is the most normal thing around here! For example I speak English and although I don't know what languages ​​you speak, we can both understand as if we speak the same language, right?


I blew out a breath, like someone who has been stressed out. And I laughed along with him. We talked for the whole afternoon until it got dark. John told me of many people he had met there, of their life stories, of their fears of returning to the real world and that until they met a 60-year-old man that we would have been living in the Hospital for 2 years.


John: Imagine how difficult it can be for that man to return to the real world. It may even end crazy!


After this John had a little more confidence and told me a little about his life. He lived in 1836. He and his wife lived on a farm in one of the central states of the United States. They had a large, red barn. This is an image somewhat similar to what he described to me that day:



  



For me John was a serious, focused and calm man. But despite this, I was surprised when he was honest with me and told me that, although he was a man who always went to church and tried to maintain an appearance before the people. Deep down he was a man who didn't care much about having a relationship with God. Nor being a quiet man in his home, since from the inside doors he was a man who was easily angry, to the point of yelling at his children and on many occasions when the anger was very great, he took his wife by force to the barn and hit him. John had been in the Hospital for 6 months, he had been called by God several times to talk in the room, but he did not want to go there. He did not want to return to his real world.

At the end of that day, I just went to my room to think about each story. It was not easy to sleep, I could not stop thinking about everything that happened in that place. So I reflected a long time about my life and why God had taken me there. I hoped I could wake up in my real bed the next day.



Day 3


Again I woke up in that strange bed and decided early to walk all over that place to see if I discovered something new. I was feeling very overwhelmed and bored. I sat watching television for several hours, as I had not done so in the previous 2 days. They gave programs of all kinds, but I kept thinking about how strange it must have been for a person who lived in a different time than mine, to see one for the first time a box with people inside.


During the rest of the day I spent walking and watching some television. I find it kind of boring to tell about it.


It was then when sitting on a bench, I could feel a new feeling, something I had never felt before in my life. It came suddenly, it was a deep peace and full of love.


Then, listen to a voice: I wait for you in your room - It was God -


I would like to be a writer with a lot of ability to describe everything I felt at the time.


It was a noble and beautiful feeling, an incredible love that completely filled me. She had no fear or doubt, it was God and she felt his sweet call to go to the room.


I don't know the kinds of problems other people had there, the reasons why they didn't want to return to their real lives. But where I felt that call from God to go to the room, I couldn't resist that tender love calling me. I didn't think about it and immediately I stood up and went quickly to my room. I was thinking about what I would see when I arrived, what would happen once we talked, if it was true that after that talk I would return to my home. But what I thought the most was how other people had felt that call and they had preferred to sit on a bench and live in that Hospital instead of going to talk to God. Really, he thought: Is the drug addiction so great that he doesn't want to return to his real life? Is your life really that horrible out there?


God comes to the room

Now, when writing this blog, years later, I become that question again and I can think that there are terrible lives that are very hard. If I had had such an ugly life, I probably would have preferred to continue living in that Hospital instead of returning to the real world. Personally, my life at that time was not very beautiful, I lived in continuous sadness and with a lack of purpose to live, but what made me go to that room to speak to God was that great and tender love. I knew that if I returned to my real life it was not going to be easy, my problems were not going to be solved at any moment. But I preferred to have a moment with God, to continue in that empty life that I had.


So I kept walking fast, and when I got close to my room. You could see a white light inside and it was so bright that the glow could be seen from the hallway. Walk the last few steps very slowly. Standing at the door of the room I could see a man with a glowing face. Sitting on my bed, his clothes and sandals were white. I cannot describe his face since, as I said, he was very bright and could not see it.


I approached little by little, I was breathless and speechless. I couldn't move and I was like a statue standing at the door. I wanted to move, I wanted to talk, I wanted to do so many things at the same time, but from the surprise I couldn't move.


God: Why have you been ignoring me when I spoke? I have wanted to talk to you many times, but you have never paid attention to me.


God told me in a soft but sad voice. When I heard these words, I was broken inside. How many times had he spoken to me and I had never paid attention to him? How many times had he wanted to spend time with me and I in my stubbornness had never wanted to believe in him?


I couldn't take it anymore and ran to him. I fell to my knees at his feet and hugged him. I felt a love as the world had not felt. He hugged me back, telling me how much he loved me and how long he had waited to speak to me. Until then I saw God as a supreme being, well, but something far from all humans. That hug that God gave me, taught me the facet of which the Bible speaks, but never made it known. Father's facet. That hug was exactly that, the hug of a Father. A hug that removed all fear and all doubt. I started asking him to forgive me for all the guilt I felt for all the moments where I ignored him and had kept him away from my life.


He hugged me tighter and told me that he must not feel guilty. That he loved me and that he was always here for me. Enjoy a few minutes hugging him, of that love and peace that I cannot describe.


I put an image similar to how I was kneeling at the time with Dad, as I now call him.





Back to real life

It was then that as John said, at that moment I started to leave that Hospital. The light that shone from God began to become more intense to the point that even though his eyes were closed, he could still feel that light that did not stop becoming more intense.


A few moments later I woke up in my real room in my house. The impression of seeing me there was as great as the one I had, 3 days ago when I entered that Hospital. It was 4 am, I felt very awake and I felt that my head was going to explode from all that I experienced.


Over the years, I have told this story to about 10 people. Some of them have been believers in God and others are atheists. I don't know if you who read this are a believer or not. I don't know if you will believe that I really dreamed it. Whether it was true or not. What I hope is that you think a little about God, about Dad. He is real, and just as he spoke to me for a long time and I ignored him, I am sure he has spoken to you. I hope you were able to hear his voice. And if I don't invite you to talk to him. That you read the Bible, where he speaks to many people and shows you what his heart is like.